NEW

This week has been about everything New.

Clearly after the major Christmas present haul my kids had been given, meant that my house was full of new fandangled toys that made loads of noise or had loads of bits that come off and go missing. (Not so much fun with a baby crawling around)
So most of this week has been trying to find new places for all these new toys to live (Also not easy when the toy boxes are over flowing). But being me I found away and most of the toys have new homes now.

Also this week I have seen a new side to E. My little girl who is normally so sweet and kind has all of a sudden hit the terrible 3’s! (She was too shy and quite at 2 to really be naughty or throw tantrums)
So we have had her refusing to sleep, eat or even take her medicine at night (she has kidney reflux, you can read about it here and here).
She has started scream when she doesn’t get her way, hitting her siblings, telling us NO! And today she kicked Baby’s leg because she didn’t get her way.
This was quickly followed by me picking her up and placing her in reflection corner for a time out.

/home/wpcom/public_html/wp-content/blogs.dir/9ee/65683610/files/2015/01/img_4762.jpg
It’s really strange because this isn’t her normal behaviour. She is normally so sweet, kind and helpful. But since she had started nursery we have slowly seen a change in her. Some were good, like her confidence had increased and she was talking to people more instead of hiding or clinging to my leg, she played with children more and participated instead of running off and playing in the corner, alone. Now thought the negatives are creeping in and if you add to them the fact she has my stubbornness, it’s not a very good mixture.
I see a lot of time outs in the future if she doesn’t learn quickly that her bad behaviour isn’t acceptable.

There have been some good new news this week too, because this week Baby has finally got her first tooth! I can not tell you how excited I was to find this out on New Year’s Eve. I have been waiting ages for this tooth to finally cut threw. Unfortunately it has meant I have had a clingy, whiney little miss stuck to me because it hurts and she is upset.

/home/wpcom/public_html/wp-content/blogs.dir/9ee/65683610/files/2015/01/img_4935.jpg
As we all know it’s is also a new year, so I have come up with the usual resolutions. Like losing weight, spending more time with family and trying not to get as stressed out.
But I have also decided that I am going to work on a new me, making new friends, getting a new look for my blog or going self hosted and trying new things. I started by trying a new tea.

/home/wpcom/public_html/wp-content/blogs.dir/9ee/65683610/files/2015/01/img_4824.jpg
I know I have to work on putting myself out there more and gaining more confidence, when it comes to talking to new people and brands (hopefully).
For the rest of the week the hubby and I are going to be discussing and coming up with a plan for changing the kids bedrooms round. So we can finally move Baby out of our room and in with her sisters.

So there you go that is what is New with us. How are you all?

Nikki x

word of the week

The Reading Residence
Binky Linky
Advertisements

Christmas

Our word this week is of course the same as most people’s.

IT’S CHRISTMAS!

This is technically my 2nd Christmas post, as I did one on Christmas Eve detailing what we usually get up during the Christmas holiday and what we did this year πŸ™‚

Christmas is always a great time and I look forwards to it most of the year. Although it’s not my favourite holiday (that’s πŸŽƒHalloweenπŸ‘»). I do still love and enjoy taking part in all the fun things to do and sharing the day with my family.
Christmas Day is the only day I know 100% that my hubby has off work each the year because his work close for the day. I love this because I know he will always be here with us as a family.

You see growing up I didn’t often have that. My mum and dad both had jobs where if they had to work Christmas Day they couldn’t really get out it. Which always seemed to take some of the sparkle or magic away for me. All I ever wanted was a day with my family without someone having to dash off to work.
They still work in similar jobs and that’s why this year we had to have an earlier Christmas dinner because both were working Christmas night.
My sisters and I take it in turns to host Christmas dinner with for my parents and this year it was my turn πŸ™‚
Them working doesn’t bother me as much now as it did as a kids because we work around their routines, so they can enjoy the Christmas fun which is great.

This year like every other my mum (and normally my dad) came round to see the kids open their presents.

/home/wpcom/public_html/wp-content/blogs.dir/9ee/65683610/files/2014/12/img_6595.jpg before they head off to work. On the days that their working it normally involves a 6am start to day, so they can get to work on time.
After the presents were open and my mum had left for work. It was still really early. The sun hadn’t even risen yet, but my kids were wide awake and full of beans. All wanting to play and open their new toys. Hubby and I sorted through the toys fixing them together, adding batteries or switching them on, before we snuck off to make breakfast and clean up.

My hubby did most of the work with breakfast while I started prepping dinner and sorting out the table.

/home/wpcom/public_html/wp-content/blogs.dir/9ee/65683610/files/2014/12/img_6553.jpg
He then put on his mistletoe head band and Christmas jumper, while getting fully into the Christmas spirit.

A little while later once the table was set and the 3 meats (lamb, beef and Turkey) roasted in the oven with the veg, stuffing and pigs in blankets. I finished setting the table and had managed to get dressed.

/home/wpcom/public_html/wp-content/blogs.dir/9ee/65683610/files/2014/12/img_6556.jpg

Soon enough the family had all arrived. This year I had my kids, my parents and my inlaws round for Christmas dinner. The table was set, the kids were all dressed and dinner was ready to be served.
(Unfortunately this is when the hectic ness set in and I didn’t manage to snap any nice pictures)
Dinner was beautiful though and I give myself a massive pay on the back. It was my first time doing a rack of lamb and to add the fact it was stuffed too. I was amazed I managed to get the cooking times all right.
At dinner the drinks began to flow and the rest of the night was spent talking, laughing and enjoying each other’s company.
I didn’t manage to snap this cute picture on baby and myself though πŸ™‚

/home/wpcom/public_html/wp-content/blogs.dir/9ee/65683610/files/2014/12/img_6558.jpg

How was your Christmas? Did you have fun?

Nikki x

word of the week

The Reading Residence


Arguments

Unfortunately this week my word is arguments.

T has hi thus peek this week and is giving us the full preteen preview of what our life is going to be like in a couple of years.
It isn’t pretty 😦

Everything we had done, said or tried has been twisted around and thrown back at us. Making us out as terrible pedants because he had fine dine thing wrong. It’s has just been at home though it’s also happened still school.
Where him doing something simple and rather minor ended up turning in a big thing. Something he could of easily of prevented if he had just listened and done as he was told. Turned into him getting a double cooler because he ignored to his teacher, walked away ignoring her and then refused to give her his planner.

He has hit rebellion city, population T!

Add that to the fact that hubby and I haven’t been in the best with each other and have been having a few harsh words or disagreements with each other, as of late and my week has been basically full of arguments.

Hubby and I have worked things out and both agreed we just needed some “US” time. So we arranged a date night and cook ourselves a nice 3 course meal with a bottle of wine. (we may have only been in our living room but the effort was there)
We took the time yo clear the air and I believe harmony has been restored in that department.

Now we just need to get through to the preteen with the chip on his shoulder.

Wish me luck!

Nikki ❀

word of the week

The Reading Residence

Routine

My word for this week is routine.

I know to many this word will seem really late as school started over a month ago. But September and start of October in this house is always a super busy time and trying to put a serious routine in place. Is like trying to collect water in a shiv. It’s not going to happen no matter how hard I try.

So I have spent most of the last month running round like a headless chicken, forgetting nearly everything (including a friends son’s birthday, all plans I have made if they haven’t been put in my phone and my head most days).

Also during this chaotic time of my kids birthdays, back to school and me slowly going loopy. I cleverly decided I needed more on my plate and got my boys to join the scouts. T is in Cubs and P is in beavers.

IMG_3853.JPG

This is as well as P’s football training and both the boys swimming lessons. Then add E’s and Baby’s play groups, early development groups and doctors appointments. I am busy constantly.

IMG_3855.JPG(here is a screen shot of my calender, each dot is a day that normally has at least 2 appointments, play groups or after school activities)

I have been in desperate need of a routine that I can stick to and Baby needs a nap routine that woks around all these appointments and group. So I can start getting stuff done.

Luckily I have spent my time this week sorting out some of my routine and although I had a blip with it tonight I have done well.

This is all going to be thrown if to chaos again soon though because today we got the call to say E’s date to start nursery has been move forward and is starting in November instead of January πŸ™‚ which is great because she is so ready for school πŸ™‚

But I guess setting up a routine will be a lot easier when there is just one at home through day πŸ™‚

Nikki ❀

word of the week

The Reading Residence

Emotional

This is the first post I have started/done in nearly 2 weeks!
I could tell you the reasons for this is because I have been busy with all the birthdays and life etc but honestly that would be a lie.

Because even though the last few weeks all I have been thinking about is that baby’s 1st birthday is coming up. (It’s actually on Saturday! Yikes!) that isn’t the reason I haven’t been blogging.

IMG_1316.JPG

See to most this is a happy, exciting time and don’t get me wrong I am thrilled my little girl is going to be 1.
But I find the closer her birthday comes the more I am thinking about the day she was born and how it was the most terrifying day of my life.
(You can read about it here)

For most people remembering the day their baby enter the world is a joyous occasion. Where they reminisce about those first moments when they are embracing them tightly, as they study all their features, about giving their baby it’s first feed or cuddle and stare into their face imprinting the image into their heart and memory forever.

For me most of those first moments aren’t filled with happiness but instead they were filled with fear, worry and terror.

this picture was taken just before the doctors came in to see me)

IMG_1322.JPG

Because while I cradled my new bundle I was gripped in fear for her future as the doctors explained to me that they believed she had Down syndrome.
In that moment everything changed.
I worried about how I would cope or look after a child with a disability. I had never done it before and I didn’t think I would be able to handle it.
The questions “Why me?”, “Why us?”, “Did I do wrong?” Whizzing round my head as I tried to take it all in.

I was still in shock from her fast arrival and then with the added shock of her diagnosis. I was completely lost! To me the future was bleak and I didn’t know where to start to process everything.

Once the doctors left the midwife give us time as a family to figure out our emotions before they explained what would happen next.

I was still cradling my precious little girl looking at her but instead of studying her face to my memory. I was looking for the characteristics that the doctor had seen. Telling myself they must of made a mistake but knowing as I stared into her face that they were right.

Time didn’t seem relevant as minute felt like hours that passed in seconds.
Because with all this happened within an hour of me giving birth.

When the midwife came back she encouraged me to try feeding and explained that it may take time or baby might be sleepy due to low muscle tone and weak suck.
Baby soon showed her though by latching on and having a good go at feeding.
But I couldn’t fully enjoy that first moment because my head was still I total mess as I had 2001 questions running through my head. Thinking about the future, my plans, my family and my kids. How was everyone going to handle the news.

A few minutes later I noticed baby was getting sleepy and was no longer suckling as much. I changed her position and that when I was thrown into one of the most terrifying moments of my life.

As I moved baby I notice she was stirring and her breathing started to shallow. I turned to my mum and asked her if something was wrong and we notice baby’s skin turning a grey colour and her lips were going blue. She couldn’t breath.

My hubby and mum went to get the help, as I held my little girl in my arms. Feeling completely helpless and not know what to do.

Luckily the staff responded quickly. The room filled professionals that whisked her out of my arms into a cot in corner of the room and put her on oxygen to bring her round.

I couldn’t watch what was going on I just held on to my husband and stared at the door in front of me. I thought she was going to die and I didn’t want that memory I didn’t want to see my child take her last breathes.

She responded to to oxygen but not enough and she was taken round to neonatal to be give support there.

My heartbroken as I watched them wheel my baby away. I as if I could go with her and broke down sobbing as they explain I couldn’t straight away.

I was lost, I was scared and was numb.

Once I was cleaned up and changed I was able to walk round and see her to say good night before I went to my room on ward.

they took this photo for me to take to my room

IMG_1323.JPG

I kissed her good night, as I silently prayed to myself that it wasn’t our last. I wanted her to fight, I wanted to be able to hold her and I didn’t want her to be apart from me.

My husband an mum got me settled in my room and left to go get some rest hoping I would do the same.
I tried to get myself settled but I just couldn’t relaxed.

Then the doctor came to visit me again and explained Baby was needing more oxygen support and she was put on a ventilator.

I rang my husband and explained everything to him. My voice breaking as I tried to fight back another round of tears.
After I hung up the phone I stared at the wall across from my bed trying to take in everything that had happened. Still asking myself “Why me?”
Why had this day that had started with so much excitement. That I had waited 42 long weeks (I went over due) for, turned into my worst nightmare.

I wasn’t meant to be sat scared, frightened and alone in a room. I was meant to be getting to know my child, kissing her little fingers as she grasped onto mine. Watching her yawn and wriggle as she realised she had more room to grow. I was meant to be holding her and protecting her. Not leaving her when she needed me most.

I felt like a failure!

Because of this I have been unable/avoiding my blog, because every time I think about the day Baby was born. The day my amazing, strong and beautiful little girl entered this world. I find myself holding back the tears as all those emotions I felt come flooding back and I’m helpless again.

Luckily I just need a smile from her or she shows me something new she has learned and they quickly disappear.

But the guilt I feel doesn’t go as quick. My guilt for being scared, for being terrified and for not being able to help. That lingers a little longer.

IMG_1344.JPG

IMG_1345.JPG

IMG_1346.JPG

For all the fear and worry I felt in the early days. I have been given an amazing little miss and I can’t believe she is going to be 1 in a few days.

Here is to many more to come πŸ™‚

Nikki ❀

Birthdays

My word this week is Birthdays

IMG_1306.JPG

This week was the start of the birthday season in this house. With 4 birthday in 3 weeks. It’s a time that is full of fun, excitement, presents and lots of cake.

It’s also a time that really hits the bank hard and I have to budget/present buy all year round to make sure they have a great day.

The birthdays started this week with E and T sharing their birthday. They were born on the same day, 7 years and 51 minutes apart. Which is completely amazing and great but also really expensive because they are both into different things and throwing a joint party isn’t an option for a stubborn strong willed nearly 3 year old or an argumentative nearly preteen, who is hitting double figures.
So we had to have 2 parties. Which was fun but extremely stressful. I did think about T having his party the weekend before his birthday to make thing easier but I had to change my plans because his dad wanted to spend that day with him. The only day available after that was his birthday.

Once we had the parties booked the real fun began and this week has been a crazy week of planning an me making sure everything was ready and sorted. I had to send out invites, buy decorations and wrap all their presents.

IMG_1308.JPG
Unfortunately my hubby was working nights and slept most of the days running up to the parties. So he wasn’t much help but he made sure he had their birthday off and that all that counted to me.

On the morning they were over the moon and their little faces lite up with excitement

IMG_1307.JPG as they ripped into their presents.
It was a great moment that makes me proud to be a mum.

The older kids had to go to school and E got ready for her Docmcstuffins themed party at a local indoor play area.

IMG_3572.JPG It was loads of fun and we invited all her friend from play group and I invited some of my friends with kids the same age.

IMG_3626.JPG (I took more photos then this but I don’t like put picture of other peoples kids unless they having given me ok before)

The party went great and she was completely poohed afterwards. There was no time to rest though because we had to go get the older kids and out again to T’s bowling party.

When I was planning T’s party his preteen(ness) shine through because he stated the he didn’t want his family bowling with him, he just wanted his friends and we were relegated to the lane next to it. Is case we “embarrassed” him.

Luckily the party went off with out a hitch and there was no embarrassment in sight.

By the end of the party all the kids were worn out but hyped up on sugar. I was also totally exhausted. But it was nothing a good nights rest (ha) and a day cleaning my house.

The rest of the week has been spent cleaning, taking boys to there after school activities and finding places for all the new toys.

This weekend is we have 2 parties to go to and then it’s my stepdaughters birthday next week and Baby’s first birthday the week after that.

So that is why this week my word is birthdays.

What is yours?

Nikki ❀

word of the week

The Reading Residence

Praise

This week my word has been Praise.

The reason this is my word this week is because I have been making a serious effort in ignoring any naughty or answering back my kids have been doing and really trying to focus on praising their good behaviour.

This is tactic we employ a lot of the time but when we were nearing the end of the summer holidays. This practise got a little lost in the boredom and constant brickering that was going on between my unruly hooligan demon lovely children. So finding the good behaviour to focus on became difficult due to the daily arguments, back chat and fighting that was going on in my once happy house.

IMG_1288.JPG
But most of last week was filled with people helping me find the positives again. With a few people telling me how polite and kind, my mischievous little munchkins can be.

So this week I made a point to pick out every positive and praise my kids because they deserve it.

T has had a great week in school and has had hardly any melt downs recently. Today he even did the washing up after breakfast with no complaints πŸ™‚ I will say it’s mainly because he is working towards me letting him ride his bike to school on his own :-s. He goes 10 next week and mum walking him to school is so “uncool” apparently.

P has been his usual nattering self but has been so sweet and kind. Telling me he loves me and how much of a great mum I am :). He has also been trying to help out with tidying round the house by moving dirty cups from room and cleaning up after him self. His little face beams with pride everytime I tell him what a great job he is doing.

E loves being told she is a good girl and is really starting to finish he toilet training. She has been dry at night for last 2 nights and makes sure she goes to loo before bed. She is so sweet to Baby an is always singing if she cries or playing with her nicely. When out at play group she normally shares without a problem and loves playing with other kids. She was always a shy on even when she was 4 months old she only ever wanted me. Now she is turning 3 I can see the change as she is really coming out of her shell. It’s beautiful to see.

Baby has been a star recently and is learning new things everyday. She babbles constantly saying ” mama mama”, “dada”, “mmmmmm”, “baba” and loads more. She is a real chatter box :). Her newest achievement is that she is finally sitting up :).

IMG_5281.JPG

This week I have had so much love and praise to give my kids. Whether it’s going great on homework, chores, kindness or learning something new. They have made me proud and happy to be their mum.

Nikki ❀

word of the week

The Reading Residence